My name is Kim McKay and I am a semi supporter of corporal punishment. This is a topic that many elude to by saying things like "I am gonna beat his butt" but often people shy away from the topic. Several people are under the assumption that it is abusive thanks to our psychology friends and sometimes it is. Several people believe it is against the law. Well, in 29 states, it is against the law for schools to use it but not parents. Several people have thought that there is a protocol and you have to use a specific instrument to discipline with corporal punishment. Well in Arkansas, the law is that you cannot abuse your child. Arkansas 12-12-503 specifically gives you the law regarding this. The Arkansas government website explains the law this way...
"Abuse can be physical or sexual. It includes non-accidental physical injury, shaking a baby, tying a child up, and giving or exposing a child to alcohol or other drugs. Reasonable and moderate discipline (such as spanking) is generally not considered abuse as long as it does not cause injury more serious than transient pain or minor temporary marks and is administered by a parent or guardian. Arkansas code 12-12-503"
It does not outline how to spank just defines what abuse is.
So why am I picking this topic as my first topic? Well, if you have read through our website or know me at all, you know that I also love the Lord and do study the scriptures. One scriptures that really made me think was Proverbs 13:24. Do you know that verse? Does it really say he that spares the rod, spoils the child? Let me just say emphatically NO. Go look it up. It actually says in 99% of the versions the following....
"He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes."
Proverbs 13:24 KJV
Hateth, hate, your son? Not spoil. There is another key word here, betimes. Do you know what that means? It means, to "spank" him early in life. By the teenage years, it is almost too late to instill corporal punishment because if you have waited until now to implement it, you most likely have an angry, rebellious child that is making you angry and you are no longer disciplining out of love. The teen years are still early in their life but you have to be careful to discipline out of love and not out of anger. Set your own limits for older kids and combine the licks with some good ole fashion labor. The hard work burns off the anger. Much like training animals, if they are "exercised first, then they are more likely to learn".
So what are you going to do if you brought your child home to educate in Jr. High or High school because of attitude? Well, first implement a good routine that includes lots of chores mixed in the day. I would even start the day off with physical fitness. Let them pick a program like INSANITY to workout and build muscles. Exercising produces the "runner's high", much like a happy drug and it makes them happy the rest of the day.
They have a strict schedule in school and the bell rings and they move on to the next task regardless of whether the first one is done. Do the same. It will be there tomorrow. Give them some ownership in the home. You don't receive an allowance for living there so I am not sure I would give them an allowance. However, let be involved by letting them physically pay the bills. Have them write out the checks and you sign them. Drive them up to the office where the bill is due and have them go in and pay. They will begin to appreciate what you do to keep that roof over their head, the lights on, the internet on, etc.
Start using coupons on a small scale and introduce them to profit sharing. Tell them that if they save $100 or more on the grocery budget, they can have 4%. That isn't much but it introduces them the real world of stocks, bonds and how far money doesn't go.
For your little guys, elementary level, don't be afraid to implement spankings but never, ever spank hard enough to leave a bruise. You simply must have control of them. Once they learn to submit to your authority, the road will get easier. If they don't learn to submit to your authority, how will they ever learn to submit to others authority?
In conclusion, discipline is a part of life. If you don't do it, the jailer, the divorce court, the Trace Adkins gun may do it for your child later in life. Wouldn't you rather them cry now than for you to mourn later? Help them have a long life and start early. More later....
"Abuse can be physical or sexual. It includes non-accidental physical injury, shaking a baby, tying a child up, and giving or exposing a child to alcohol or other drugs. Reasonable and moderate discipline (such as spanking) is generally not considered abuse as long as it does not cause injury more serious than transient pain or minor temporary marks and is administered by a parent or guardian. Arkansas code 12-12-503"
It does not outline how to spank just defines what abuse is.
So why am I picking this topic as my first topic? Well, if you have read through our website or know me at all, you know that I also love the Lord and do study the scriptures. One scriptures that really made me think was Proverbs 13:24. Do you know that verse? Does it really say he that spares the rod, spoils the child? Let me just say emphatically NO. Go look it up. It actually says in 99% of the versions the following....
"He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes."
Proverbs 13:24 KJV
Hateth, hate, your son? Not spoil. There is another key word here, betimes. Do you know what that means? It means, to "spank" him early in life. By the teenage years, it is almost too late to instill corporal punishment because if you have waited until now to implement it, you most likely have an angry, rebellious child that is making you angry and you are no longer disciplining out of love. The teen years are still early in their life but you have to be careful to discipline out of love and not out of anger. Set your own limits for older kids and combine the licks with some good ole fashion labor. The hard work burns off the anger. Much like training animals, if they are "exercised first, then they are more likely to learn".
So what are you going to do if you brought your child home to educate in Jr. High or High school because of attitude? Well, first implement a good routine that includes lots of chores mixed in the day. I would even start the day off with physical fitness. Let them pick a program like INSANITY to workout and build muscles. Exercising produces the "runner's high", much like a happy drug and it makes them happy the rest of the day.
They have a strict schedule in school and the bell rings and they move on to the next task regardless of whether the first one is done. Do the same. It will be there tomorrow. Give them some ownership in the home. You don't receive an allowance for living there so I am not sure I would give them an allowance. However, let be involved by letting them physically pay the bills. Have them write out the checks and you sign them. Drive them up to the office where the bill is due and have them go in and pay. They will begin to appreciate what you do to keep that roof over their head, the lights on, the internet on, etc.
Start using coupons on a small scale and introduce them to profit sharing. Tell them that if they save $100 or more on the grocery budget, they can have 4%. That isn't much but it introduces them the real world of stocks, bonds and how far money doesn't go.
For your little guys, elementary level, don't be afraid to implement spankings but never, ever spank hard enough to leave a bruise. You simply must have control of them. Once they learn to submit to your authority, the road will get easier. If they don't learn to submit to your authority, how will they ever learn to submit to others authority?
In conclusion, discipline is a part of life. If you don't do it, the jailer, the divorce court, the Trace Adkins gun may do it for your child later in life. Wouldn't you rather them cry now than for you to mourn later? Help them have a long life and start early. More later....
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